I remember I started my journey of exploring Eastern Spirituality by reading Eckhart Tolle’s book, The Power of Now.
Now almost 20 years later I have gone back to reading that book again. It has been an interesting journey with some memorable highs. But although I have grown in some ways I also regressed when I took breaks from my practice. As a result I now find myself with the same cluttered and scattered mind I had when I started the journey 20 years ago. The only difference is that I am now 20 years older.
So one lesson I learnt was that it is necessary to continue with your practice at all times – good and bad. Otherwise you might find yourself playing a game of snakes and ladders and falling down a snake whenever you make some progress.
Anyway back to Eckhart Tolle’s book and my proposed remedy for loneliness. Eckhart makes a distinction between your life and your life situation. As best I understand it your life situation is related to your ego. That is it is related to your BMI (Body-Mind-Intellect) and the roles you play in society. For example my life situation is that I am 56 years old, a bachelor, a smoker with a failed career and non-existent social life.
If I identify with these aspects of my life situation and think that that is what I am then I am likely to become depressed and stay depressed. But underlying my life situation is my life – that is what I am experiencing the Present, the Eternal Now.
And what does the eternal Now consist of – it is what I experience as I go through the day. The sound of the fan in my room as I am typing this article, the touch of my fingers on the keyboard, every breath I take, everything that is a part of my experience of the Now.
The Now also of course also contains my thinking and my emotions. And these are not always pleasant. In fact they can be very unpleasant at times. But the key point is that I am not these thoughts and emotions.
I am not the Mind. I am not the roles I play (the ones I described above). I am simply the witnessing spirit – the Atman.
And it is possible for me (in theory) to experience the stillness that is my true nature right here and right now if I free myself from my identification with the Mind and Body and the roles I play in society.
This is easier said than done of course but you can make it a lifelong quest. And you will find that it is a cure not just loneliness but also for pretty much 90% of our worries in life. As Mark Twain said – “I am an old man and have known a great many troubles, most of which never happened”
I highly recommend The Power of Now. This book has helped many people – even those facing life threatening illness or imminent death. Quoting from the book – I have received feedback of the amazing and beneficial effects of inner body awareness, the sense of freedom that comes from letting go of self-identification with one’s personal history and life situation and a new found inner peace that arises as one learns to relinquish mental/emotional resistance to the “suchness” of the present moment.
Basically the book is asking us to turn our attention away from our ego and direct it to experiencing life which we can only do in the Eternal Now.
Here is a related video by Osho that gives similar advice. You may not care for all that Osho says but his basics are solid
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